“You don’t understand,” you might say. “My parents spent thousands of dollars, and I have so many expectations riding on this, and if something goes wrong, then I’ve ruined everything. Do you even understand that kind of pressure?”

newswhore:

An open letter to the Class of 2013 inspired by my friend who had a nervous breakdown and went to the hospital because of graduation stress. 

newswhore:

“I’m The Comic Who Was Fired Because 10 Men Heckled Me To Show My Breasts And Vagina.” 

“Hey. The next time a bunch of guys are shouting ‘Show us your tits!  Show us your bush!’ you might want to tell them to shut up.” The manager was taken aback. “Oh. I thought you liked it.”

newswhore:

What the fuck. @JoseCanseco posts picture, phone, location of rape accuser; live-tweets accusations. 

newswhore:

Should I be offended that a guy I’m seeing refused a blow job and said his penis was “on vacation”? And what is a penis vacation? Should I take one? Do all the penises get together and go on a big Carnival cruise together? Is there a limbo competition at any point? An all-you-can-eat penis bar? 

Maybe the better question is: Should your vagina be on vacation?

My acupuncturist once told me: “Mandy, love that little child inside of you.” Amy Poehler said this once at an event I went to, and I’ve never forgotten it: “Love the 10-year-old you.”

Love the 10-year-old you who just went for it, awkwardly, blindly, fucking it up, but still going for it, bad hair, bad teeth, bad clothes, and you BELIEVED and you stumbled but there was a part of you that just knew.You just knew how rad you are.

newswhore:

How to love the 10-year-old girl within, or a manifesto for single women everywhere.

newswhore:

“Worship power, you will end up feeling weak and afraid, and you will need ever more power over others to numb you to your own fear. Worship your intellect, being seen as smart, you will end up feeling stupid, a fraud, always on the verge of being found out. But the insidious thing about these forms of worship is not that they’re evil or sinful, it’s that they’re unconscious. They are default settings.” — — David Foster Wallace’s “This is Water” was given 8 years ago today

newswhore:

“I will never trust people who can almost never admit they are wrong or have immense trouble doing so. In interacting with this type of human being, it is almost as if I can see, nearly flickering in their visibility, the distinct walls surrounding them. You will never get through those walls. Ever. But — you will knock yourself out running up against them, time and time again.” Reflections on the 8th anniversary of David Foster Wallace’s life-changing “This is Water” speech.

“I got kicked off an elitist dating website, and I’m not sure if it was my racist or my resume.”

newswhore:

Are you there, Jesus? It’s me, Mandy.

“Fuck you,” I said. “And that’s Jesus talking. Directly. That was his special message for you, buddy.”

#SHE IS NOT EVEN ANYWHERE NEAR THE GENERAL AREA OF FUCKING AROUND GODDAMN

(Source: alianovnataliasoldblog)